Many years ago, a friend of mine was diagnosed with brain cancer. The cancer was treatable, but the doctors told her that her right eye was going to have to come out. She was devastated.
So she came to talk to me, the one person she knew who was blind in one eye. We talked for a while, and I reassured her that life would go on, that she would be okay, and that she’d still be able to do most of the things she was able to do before.
That’s what happened. There were some adjustments, learning to cope with issues of depth and balance, but years later, she’s doing well. She’s married with children and she’s able to do most of what she was able to do before.
As for me, I also experienced a bit of loss, although it’s a lot more subtle. I was born with an optic nerve coloboma and was legally blind, but in adulthood I suffered a detached retina that turned almost no vision to no vision, and was strongly advised not to attempt surgery. My loss was not like hers — it was more psychological than practical — but I also had to work through it.
Here are a few things I learned from watching her, and from thinking about my own experience.
It’s okay to mourn
Losing vision is a loss. It’s perfectly okay to be sad about that. Maybe it affected your life in a major way, such as being put out of the military, or maybe you can’t play softball anymore. Those things matter, and it’s okay to be sad about them. Don’t let anyone tell you different.
At some point you might need professional help to push through it. That’s okay, too.
You may have to learn some new tricks
My brain has a lifetime of learning to work with one eye. I’ve read stories of people who had trouble pouring coffee into a cup at first, and your sense of balance may be affected for a time. The good news is that the human body is an adaptable little thing, and in time you’ll start learning how to adjust. That may mean you have to do little things that other people don’t, but you’ll adjust.
In the long run, it might not affect you as much as you think
Having monocular vision is not a death sentence. Far from it. I’ve managed a successful career and even some athletic success. Other people have gone on to become successful politicians, actors, and even pilots. Once you learn to adapt — and you will — you’ll find that you can do most of the things you could do before.
Will you be able to play baseball? Probably not.
Will you be able to watch 3D? Nope.
Will you be able to run, swim, cook, golf, bowl, hike, sing? Yes.
Will you be able to drive? Yes.
Because in the big picture, losing an eye takes away about 5% of the things you’re otherwise able to do. But for most people, there’s still the 95%.
That doesn’t mean you won’t sometimes miss the 5%. Heck, I miss the 5%, and I never had it.
But your life will be far more normal than you might think.